3 Decision-Making Mistakes You Should Avoid

A moment of poor judgment can lead to a lifetime of regret. And who hasn’t made a few undeniably bad decisions? Poor decisions, especially in our youth, seem to be part of the deal.
Yet, some of us march right into adulthood without learning more effective decision-making skills.
In our NLP practitioner course, we routinely ask students to analyze their bad decisions and decipher the pattern behind them.
We train around 350 students every year, so we’ve had lots of opportunities to discover common patterns. Here are three decision-making mistakes that you simply must avoid if you want to make solid decisions.

1. Impulsivity

See it. Buy it!
Feels good? Do it!
She says jump. How high?
Impulsive decisions aren’t inherently bad. You can order lunch impulsively and if it turns out to be a bad decision, you’ll get through it.
Marrying someone impulsively, on the other hand, can be a disaster that haunts you forever. Amazingly, the decision to marry is one of the more common impulsive decisions that people report.
Decisions in general, are made through imagery, sounds, and feelings. We see options, discuss them internally (or with someone else) and feel positively or negatively about moving ahead.
Thorough decisions combine all three senses - seeing, hearing and feeling. Impulsive decisions always lack one of these elements. We don’t review all the options. We don’t discuss or we don’t search our feelings.
So, be thorough in your processing and DON’T make impulsive decisions when it counts!

 “One of the most important things that I have learned in my 57 years is that life is all about choices. On every journey you take, you face choices. At every fork in the road, you make a choice. And it is those decisions that shape our lives.” – Mark DeWine

2. Allowing yourself to be persuaded against your better judgment

One lady reported that she came to a very solid decision about purchasing a new car. It looked nice (imagery), but after she drove the car (feeling) she realized that it was too big for her. She didn’t fit in the seats very well and was uncomfortable maneuvering the vehicle. She gave herself a good talking to (sounds) and decided to pass on the vehicle.
Then the salesman joined into her little discussion. An hour later she drove off the lot in her brand new car! Three years later, she has two years left on the loan and regrets the decision every time she gets behind the wheel.
Sometimes we allow the judgment of others to interfere with our own. This isn’t always a bad thing, but when the other has a selfish agenda, it usually is bad!
Don’t allow others with an agenda to hijack your good decisions.

 “Sometimes it’s the smallest decisions that can change your life forever.” – Keri Russell

3. Cerebral spinning

Or analysis paralysis. In this case, you spin on your thoughts (the images and sounds flowing through your mind) without arriving at the feeling that prompts you to act one way or another.
Our students often describe cerebral spinning as form of inner conflict. On the one hand, this. On the other hand, that. Round and round we go!

How do you counter cerebral spinning? Here are three ideas (implement at your own risk):

• Assume that spinning on thoughts and remaining in conflict means ‘no’. Inner conflict is certainly not a yes. Consider your decision to be no and move on to other things. 

• Put off your decision for a while. Allow your subconscious processes to do their job. Vow to avoid thinking about it until a certain date and then see where you’re at.

• Make an assessment of the risks involved in making the decision. What’s at stake? If there is a lot at stake, then pat yourself on the back for taking this decision so seriously. If there is little at stake, then take a small risk!

Imagine making solid, congruent and healthy decisions 99% of the time. What difference would it make in your success?

 More at:http://addicted2success.com/life/3-decision-making-mistakes-you-should-avoid/

8 Ways to Be a More Confident Person

8 Ways to Be a More Confident Person

Because there’s power in self-confidence. Here’s how to get it.

YEC

Look at yourself. Who do you see? Superhero, muscles bulging, cape flying—ready to conquer the world? No? If you don’t believe you can conquer the world, then there’s no way you ever will.

You might not be superhuman, but you can combat the villain of low self-esteem. How? We asked the Young Entrepreneur Council (YEC), “What is one way someone can build their self-confidence, personally and professionally?” for answers.

Here are their suggestions for a boost:

1. Strengthen your mind.

Self-confidence is a state of mind that can be achieved through intentional action. Allotting time to nurture your mind, body and spirit (preferably one hour a day) can be done in a variety of ways. I prefer to read, exercise and meditate in the morning. If you’re not taking time for yourself, then you’re allowing someone or something to shape your view of the world.

—Dustin Cucciarre, BryghtAds Inc.

2. Discard the negative thoughts you don’t need.

A whole new branch of psychology is dedicated to mindfulness, but it boils down to this: Negative thoughts and insecurities pop up like pimples. And, like pimples, picking at them—even if you mean to discredit and burst that negative bubble—ultimately makes it worse. So, mindfulness practice teaches you to treat thoughts as tools. Use and strengthen the ones you need; discard the ones you don’t.

—Manpreet Singh, TalkLocal

3. Live a lifestyle of personal growth.

Putting yourself into courses or professional relationships that force you to grow ensures that you’re always expanding, which in turn generates confidence and humility. From therapeutic programs to leadership programs to physical programs, committing to this kind of regular growth and showing up and being fully present are the keys to confidence.

—Corey Blake, Round Table Companies

4. Learn about impostor syndrome.

Many professionals will at some point experience a psychological phenomenon known as imposter syndrome, complete with feelings of inadequacy and a fear that everything accomplished to date has been through sheer luck. To overcome this, learn to internalize accomplishments. Peer groups are a great place to talk it out and build confidence.

—Joel Holland, Video Blocks

5. Dress for success.

No matter what level of business you’re in, it’s important to dress for the client you want, rather than the client you have. There’s this idea of working from home in PJs. The most successful people get up early and dress like they’re off for a day at the office, and it’s reflected in their attitude. When you look good, you feel good and you’re more confident, too.

—Nicole Munoz, Start Ranking Now

6. Take an improv class.

Improv classes make you think on your toes in front of an audience. Being on stage helps grow your confidence; being in front of crowds teaches you how to think and react quickly—all things that translate well to a boardroom or public speaking opportunity.

—Brooke Bergman, Allied Business Network Inc.

7. Produce a high-quality personal brand.

I believe that a key component to building self-confidence is in publicly building one’s own brand. This can be done through the creation of high-quality content like blog posts, e-books, podcasts or video content. Even if it doesn’t receive much traction initially, the fact that you have a body of work that you are proud to refer others to can make a big difference in your self-confidence.

—Joshua Dorkin, BiggerPockets, Inc.

8. Recognize your value outside of your work.

Your self-confidence needs to be rooted in who you are completely outside of your success in business. So find ways to get connected with yourself and grow. Perhaps volunteer, do pro-bono work, meditate, work out, read, hang out with friends. Whatever it takes for you to see your value regardless of how well [you’re doing professionally].

—Darrah Brustein, Network Under 40 / Finance Whiz Kids

So, look again. Is your cape flying?

Your sense of self-worth is integral to achieving success. Find out how to find your true value in a world of material success.

- See more at: http://www.success.com/article/8-ways-to-be-a-more-confident-person#sthash.pksgFRXU.dpuf

 

3 Must-Haves For Increasing Your Self-Esteem

Why are your successes never enough to outweigh the failure you fear and take so personally?
This fear has planted roots in your psyche and eroded your self-esteem. It cripples your thinking and overshadows everything you do.
What you and most people don’t understand is that success is personal.
Unless you make it personal, you’ll be stuck forever in the tracks your fear has laid down.
When I finally realized the biggest barrier to my success was me, I honestly didn’t know what to do.
For too many years, my success had depended on getting recognized for my contributions as I helped other people become successful. It took me a while to realize that my unquenchable need for their approval had screwed up my self-esteem.
Too bad I didn’t realize that before starting my own business.

Learning to Get Out of Your Own Way

It wasn’t just the business failure though – I had failed myself. Going to work for someone else again would have been another kind of failure.
I had to figure out how to move forward differently.
To do that, I had to accept failure as the great information provider it is, instead of a personal reflection of me.
In doing that I came to understand the personal nature of success.

The 3 Must-Haves I Discovered That Will Up Your Self-Esteem and Drive Your Success

Because success is personal – you must get personal with yourself.
In building up my self-esteem, I had to rethink how I looked at myself. That’s what you’ll need to do too.
These exercises will have you becoming less outwardly focused, and more self-aware, in a good, non-obsessive way.
They are the necessary steps for changing your motivation from fear to one that will have you manifesting a success that is uniquely yours.

Must-Have #1: Good Control Over Your Inner Critic

No one is harder on you than you. One of the biggest barriers to your success is all the negative self-talk your inner critic inflicts on you.
It affects not only how you think about yourself (self-esteem), but also how you think about what you do (self-worth.)
Too much negativity and your inner critic harps on all your real or imagined failings. You need to get that ongoing barrage of abuse under control.

Controlling Your Inner Critic

How do you do it?
Ridicule.
Seriously, when your inner critic starts dumping on you:

1. Turn it into a figure of fun.
2. Laugh at it! Laugh at what it says about you.
3. Imagine how ridiculous it looks, and take that look to the extreme.

I see my inner critic as a bulldog – with a bright pink ruff around its neck. Just picturing it shrinking down and sitting in one of those fancy little teacups makes me laugh.

Why does this work?

By taking control of your interactions with your inner critic, you’re stepping out of the role of being its victim. Taking control is a positive step that ups your self-esteem.
The more you interrupt your inner critic’s patterns of negativity, the easier it is to change what you think about yourself.

“To dream by night is to escape your life. To dream by day is to make it happen.” – Stephen Richards

Must-Have #2: Willingness to Embrace Your Weaknesses

Criticizing yourself for having weaknesses, over-compensating for them, or blaming them for your failures actually gets in the way of your success.
This must-have is about looking at them and yourself with compassion. Just believing you deserve such kindness is a great boost to your self-esteem.

Embracing Your Weaknesses

So what do you do?
Switch from a criticizing mindset to one that looks for improvements. Accept both your strengths and weaknesses.
This is how you start:

1. Identify where you can make small changes that have a positive impact.
2. Start by going for easy wins.
3. Get the changes locked-in, and move onto the next ones.

When you disparage parts of yourself, you create internal conflicts and end up focusing on fixing the wrong things.

Why does this work?

There are three primary reasons why this works:

1. Small changes add up and create larger impacts.
2. One success builds on another.
3. Doing positive things for yourself adds to your feelings of self-worth, and ups your self-esteem.

When I did this, I saw where I could make changes to my business model. The result? More opportunities for success, and more trust in myself.

“Motivation is what gets you started. Habit is what keeps you going.” – Jim Ryun

Must-Have #3: An Old-Fashioned “Fly By The Seat of Your Pants” Attitude

The first planes were essentially physical extensions of the pilots. The actions the fliers took were limited, purposeful and focused on achieving the desired outcome.
There’s nothing like life or death situations for giving purpose and meaning to what you do.
What you need to have is the same attitude as the old-fashioned pilots. Don’t make a move that doesn’t have the express purpose of getting you one step closer to success.

Getting This Focused Attitude

How do you get it?
Start by answering this question: What do you value and how do you want to be manifesting, feeling, and expressing those values to the world?
Then expand your answer by completing these 3 steps:

1. Identify your self-chosen ideals, the ones that resonate with you.
2. Translate them to specific value statements for all areas of your life: family, health, financial, spiritual, community, etc.
3. Determine what you want to manifest and express to the world about your values.

Taking this advice that comes from Jack Canfield helped me consolidate the changes I was making, and increased my focus.  Doing this work helps you build the foundation of your success.
  Why does this work?
It’s about connecting the dots between your thinking, feelings, and beliefs. When you’re done, you have an integrated picture of who you are and clarity on what you value.
This is where success gets personal.
This is where you clearly define what success means to you.
This is where you get your ongoing motivation for manifesting your success.
How The 3 Must-Haves Work Together To Up Your Self-Esteem and Drive Your Success
It takes a healthy self-esteem to put yourself out there in a way that is uniquely personal to you.
A mindset that looks for improvements helps you handle setbacks and failures, in a positive way.
The right attitude keeps the focus on what you value and how you express those values. It’s what pulls all the pieces together and gets everything you do pointing in the same direction.
When that happens, you know what advice to follow, what programs to use, and what steps to implement.

“The mind is a powerful thing. It can take you through walls.” – Denis Avey

This Is Your Personal Brand of Success
It’s all about you and how you’re expressing and manifesting what you want in your life.
It’s what I’m doing in mine. Finally, for the first time in my life, I’m living and expressing what I value through the work I’ve chosen to do.
Having control over your life and your success in this way is enormously empowering – and more than worth all the effort.
Start at the beginning. Do all the exercises. Take a good look at what you value and how you want to express it.
That’s the success you want.
That’s the success you’ll create.
That’s the success you’ll drive right through the roof.

More at http://addicted2success.com/success-advice/3-must-haves-for-upping-your-self-esteem-and-driving-your-success-through-the-roof-2/

5 Ways to Supercharge Your Morning Habits, by Joel Brown

5 Ways to Supercharge Your Morning Habits

There are a million and one articles out there about the top habits and the best morning rituals to follow. And that’s awesome, because habits are great. I believe habits are one of the cornerstone key elements for achieving success.
But once you have your habits down and you’ve decided to commit to them, you’ll discover that it’s not as easy as it sounds to just slot a long list of new habits into your new morning routine.
So I’ve decided to share with you some nice and easy techniques that I shared with My Morning Motivation Call – Elite Members so you to can implement them along side your new morning habits for better success.

1 - Know The True Value of Each Habit

A great way to work out if you’re wasting way too much time on menial day to day task’s is to sit back and ask yourself:

“If I was running a billion dollar company. Would I be doing …. (fill in the blank) or, If my life will be ending in the next few months, would this task of…… be important to me”

And if the answer is “No”, then find someone you can delegate the task to, or cut back on that specific task. You should always be thinking… What is the value in doing this task?
A great way to get clear on the value of your habits is to write down a list of the habits you practice daily, good and bad. And, remember, you want to get familiar with them all.
I call this “The Habit Value Exercise”
Then next to each habit write the benefit of sticking to it. If it’s a negative habit, you will know straight away whether it serves you or not.
After you have written out each habit, write a number next to each habit in the order of importance.
1 being the most important of course.
This will highlight for you, what the most important habits are you should be sticking to each day so you can live a more fulfilling and successful life.

2 - Take Advantage of Your Will Power

Your will power is at it’s strongest first thing in the morning and it’s just like a muscle, it fatigues when it’s over exerted. So the first thing you want to do is tackle your biggest and heftiest tasks as soon as you get into the day.
Plus, if you knock out your biggest task first thing in the morning, you’ll breeze through your list of to-do’s with style and grace!

 

3 - Practice Gratitudes to Strengthen Your Habits

Practice being grateful for the positive habits you have implemented. Gratitudes serve as great reminders of what you have accomplished. So when you focus on appreciating the positive habits you’ve been able commit to this will reinforce them and make them easier for you to stick to.
Focus is another key to success. Gratitudes are a great way to stay focused on the positive.
When you say your gratitudes ie.. “I am grateful for the fact that I can stick to pushups/skipping/running every morning”, then make sure you justify why.
For example; “Because, this will keep my body in top form, the exercise will improve my brain performance and I will feel a lot happier from the endorphins released by doing this.”
This is a powerful technique to use while practicing any gratitude in your life because it encourages you to dig deeper to really feel why you’re doing it and it links you to a positive thought about that habit.
And pleasure is a great motivator!

4 - Know That Energy is The Most Important Commodity

Here’s a question for you: For you to achieve more and be more in life, what would you need more of?
Time or Energy?
Hold that thought…..
Now Let’s say the average age expectancy is around 79 years old. So If you spent most of your life sitting around on a couch but you lived for 100 years, would you be able to achieve more in life than someone who lived for only 79 years?
If that person who lived to 79 years old was someone who had an abundance of energy, who maximised their days by waking up at a reasonable time and made the effort on a daily basis to fulfil their life; physically, spiritually, mentally and emotionally who would you say truly lived to the fullest?
As you can see, from this example, Energy shows up as the top priority. Not time. Time is only good if you know what to do with it.
So if the key to living with higher impacting habits is to stick to them on a consistent basis wouldn’t it make sense to focus your day, and your habits around maximising your energy?

Here are some Energy Increasing actions you can add into your morning routine to work alongside your habits:

Take a 10 minute walk around the block – Studies show that a brisk 10 minute walk can bring a long lasting energy boost for up to 2 hours. Exercise also fires up the (prefrontal cortex) a.k.a “the executive part of your brain” for better focus, analysing and decision making. If walkings not your thing, pump iron, run, skip, swim or spin. Whatever gets your heart rate up and your body moving.

Stay away from Sugars and Heavy foods – Sugar may give you a temporary buzz but the crash is not worth it. If you’re looking for a long lasting energy, keep your diet light and healthy.
Hydrate – When you hydrate your body is no longer overheated, your body can function fluently, revitalising your muscles, digestion and brain function for you to knock out your daily habits.

Have a Cold Shower – Cold showers, or James Bond Showers as they call them have also proven to increase Alertness, Immunity, Circulation, Weight Loss, Stress Relief and Muscle Recovery. Everything that works hand in hand with daily energy.
I made it a habit to have a cold shower for 31 days in March. It’s been 49 days now and It feels like something is wrong if I don’t have the shower chilled. So yes! It get’s easier. You adjust and it’s well worth the benefits.
Meditate – Your Brain uses around 20% of your bodies energy to operate throughout the day so why not recharge it with a meditation or two.
Meditation is different to sleep, Deepak Chopra recently told me during my podcast interview with him that meditation is nearly 2 times more powerful than sleep. How amazing is that?

Cut back on distractions – Some e-mails, Facebook messages, Twitter replies and other notifications can stress you out or leave a lot more unnecessary things on your plate. So switch off or disable any distractions until the end of the day so you can be more effective with your more important tasks when your energy and will power is high and when it counts.

5 - Get the gloves ready for your “Tomorrow PUNCH LIST!”

That’s right! The most successful achievers stick to their lists and make it a daily habit to craft it the night before.
You should write out a list of things you need to do tomorrow, before you get there. A lot of the super successful I have interviewed over the last few years shared with me that they list the actions they need to take the following day so they can get a good nights rest, knowing they will have direction and structure to work with when they wake up the next day.
This is a great way to put your mind at rest so you can be present at dinner and with your family and friends outside of work hours.
More at: http://addicted2success.com/motivation/5-ways-to-supercharge-your-morning-habits/

Anthony Robbins: Who Do You Think You Are?

Rohn: The 4 Powerful Ways to Change a Bad Habit

What feelings truly push people outside their comfort zone?

Jim Rohn

No one understands as I do the inherent difficulty in changing old and persistent habits. But habits begin to change when we begin to change our perceptions.
Most of us don’t experience a cataclysmic transformation. No, for most of us change comes as an evolutionary process of almost imperceptible changes. We just keep nudging ourselves in the right direction, forming one or two better habits.
But what really makes us sit up and take notice? What really causes us to shed our old habits and take action?
Disgust with ourselves.
Making a decision when our backs are to the wall.
Desire that won’t be extinguished.
Resolve to do or die.
Emotions are the most powerful forces inside us. Under the power of emotions, human beings can perform the most heroic (as well as barbaric) acts. To a great degree, civilization itself can be defined as the intelligent channeling of human emotion. Emotions are fuel and the mind is the pilot, which together propel the ship of civilized progress.
In this excerpt from 7 Strategies for Wealth & Happiness, Jim Rohn describes four basic emotions that can trigger the most incredible activity. The day that you channel these emotions to fuel your desire is the day you’ll turn your life around.
1. Disgust
One does not usually equate the word “disgust” with positive action. And yet properly channeled, disgust can change a person’s life. The person who feels disgusted has reached a point of no return. He or she is ready to throw down the gauntlet at life and say, “I’ve had it!” That’s what I said after many humiliating experiences. At age 25, I said, “I don’t want to live like this anymore. I’ve had it with being broke. I’ve had it with being embarrassed, and I’ve had it with lying.”
Yes, productive feelings of disgust come when a person says, “Enough is enough.”
They’ve had it with mediocrity. They’ve had it with those awful sick feelings of fear, pain and humiliation. They decide they are not going to live like this anymore. Call it what you will, the “I’ve had it” day, the “never again” day, the “enough’s enough” day. Whatever you call it, it’s powerful! There is nothing so life-changing as gut-wrenching disgust!
2. Decision
Most of us need to be pushed to the wall to make decisions. And once we reach this point, we have to deal with the conflicting emotions that come with making them. We have reached a fork in the road. Now this fork can be a two-prong, three-prong or even a four-prong fork. No wonder that decision-making can create knots in stomachs, keep us awake in the middle of the night or make us break out in a cold sweat.
Making life-changing decisions can be likened to internal civil war. Conflicting armies of emotions, each with its own arsenal of reasons, battle each other for supremacy of our minds. And our resulting decisions, whether bold or timid, well thought out or impulsive, can either set the course of action or blind it. I don’t have much advice to give you about decision-making except this:
Whatever you do, don’t camp at the fork in the road. Decide. It’s far better to make a wrong decision than to not make one at all. Each of us must confront our emotional turmoil and sort out our feelings.
3. Desire
How does one gain desire? I don’t think I can answer this directly because there are many ways. But I do know two things about desire:
a. It comes from the inside, not the outside.
b. It can be triggered by outside forces.
Almost anything can trigger desire. It’s a matter of timing as much as preparation. It might be a song that tugs at the heart. It might be a memorable sermon. It might be a movie, a conversation with a friend, a confrontation with the enemy or a bitter experience. Even a book or an article such as this one can trigger the inner mechanism that will make some people say, “I want it now!”
Therefore, while searching for your “hot button” of pure, raw desire, welcome into your life each positive experience. Don’t erect a wall to protect you from experiencing life. The same wall that keeps out your disappointment also keeps out the sunlight of enriching experiences. So let life touch you. The next touch could be the one that turns your life around.
4. Resolve
Resolve says, “I will.” These two words are among the most potent in the English language. I will. Benjamin Disraeli, the great British statesman, once said, “Nothing can resist a human will that will stake even its existence on the extent of its purpose.” In other words, when someone resolves to “do or die,” nothing can stop him.
The mountain climber says, “I will climb the mountain. They’ve told me it’s too high, it’s too far, it’s too steep, it’s too rocky, it’s too difficult. But it’s my mountain. I will climb it. You’ll soon see me waving from the top or you’ll never see me, because unless I reach the peak, I’m not coming back.” Who can argue with such resolve?
When confronted with such iron-willed determination, I can see Time, Fate and Circumstance calling a hasty conference and deciding, “We might as well let him have his dream. He’s said he’s going to get there or die trying.”
The best definition for “resolve” I’ve ever heard came from a schoolgirl in Foster City, California. Many years ago, I was lecturing about success to a group of bright kids at a junior high school. I asked, “Who can tell me what ‘resolve’ means?” Several hands went up, and I did get some pretty good definitions. But the last was the best. A shy girl from the back of the room got up and said with quiet intensity, “I think resolve means promising yourself you will never give up.” That’s it! That’s the best definition I’ve ever heard: Promise yourself you’ll never give up.
Think about it! How long should a baby try to learn how to walk? How long would you give the average baby before you say, “That’s it, you’ve had your chance”? You say that’s crazy? Of course it is. Any mother would say, “My baby is going to keep trying until he learns how to walk!” No wonder everyone walks.
There is a vital lesson in this. Ask yourself, “How long am I going to work to make my dreams come true?” I suggest you answer, “As long as it takes.” That’s what these four emotions are all about.

- See more at: http://www.success.com/article/rohn-the-4-powerful-ways-to-change-a-bad-habit#sthash.59KuzNpF.dpuf

What feelings truly push people outside their comfort zone?

Jim Rohn

No one understands as I do the inherent difficulty in changing old and persistent habits. But habits begin to change when we begin to change our perceptions.

Most of us don’t experience a cataclysmic transformation. No, for most of us change comes as an evolutionary process of almost imperceptible changes. We just keep nudging ourselves in the right direction, forming one or two better habits.

But what really makes us sit up and take notice? What really causes us to shed our old habits and take action?

Disgust with ourselves.
Making a decision when our backs are to the wall.
Desire that won’t be extinguished.
Resolve to do or die.

Emotions are the most powerful forces inside us. Under the power of emotions, human beings can perform the most heroic (as well as barbaric) acts. To a great degree, civilization itself can be defined as the intelligent channeling of human emotion. Emotions are fuel and the mind is the pilot, which together propel the ship of civilized progress.

In this excerpt from 7 Strategies for Wealth & Happiness, Jim Rohn describes four basic emotions that can trigger the most incredible activity. The day that you channel these emotions to fuel your desire is the day you’ll turn your life around.

1. Disgust

One does not usually equate the word “disgust” with positive action. And yet properly channeled, disgust can change a person’s life. The person who feels disgusted has reached a point of no return. He or she is ready to throw down the gauntlet at life and say, “I’ve had it!” That’s what I said after many humiliating experiences. At age 25, I said, “I don’t want to live like this anymore. I’ve had it with being broke. I’ve had it with being embarrassed, and I’ve had it with lying.”

Yes, productive feelings of disgust come when a person says, “Enough is enough.”

They’ve had it with mediocrity. They’ve had it with those awful sick feelings of fear, pain and humiliation. They decide they are not going to live like this anymore. Call it what you will, the “I’ve had it” day, the “never again” day, the “enough’s enough” day. Whatever you call it, it’s powerful! There is nothing so life-changing as gut-wrenching disgust!

2. Decision

Most of us need to be pushed to the wall to make decisions. And once we reach this point, we have to deal with the conflicting emotions that come with making them. We have reached a fork in the road. Now this fork can be a two-prong, three-prong or even a four-prong fork. No wonder that decision-making can create knots in stomachs, keep us awake in the middle of the night or make us break out in a cold sweat.

Making life-changing decisions can be likened to internal civil war. Conflicting armies of emotions, each with its own arsenal of reasons, battle each other for supremacy of our minds. And our resulting decisions, whether bold or timid, well thought out or impulsive, can either set the course of action or blind it. I don’t have much advice to give you about decision-making except this:

Whatever you do, don’t camp at the fork in the road. Decide. It’s far better to make a wrong decision than to not make one at all. Each of us must confront our emotional turmoil and sort out our feelings.

3. Desire

How does one gain desire? I don’t think I can answer this directly because there are many ways. But I do know two things about desire:

a. It comes from the inside, not the outside.
b. It can be triggered by outside forces.

Almost anything can trigger desire. It’s a matter of timing as much as preparation. It might be a song that tugs at the heart. It might be a memorable sermon. It might be a movie, a conversation with a friend, a confrontation with the enemy or a bitter experience. Even a book or an article such as this one can trigger the inner mechanism that will make some people say, “I want it now!”

Therefore, while searching for your “hot button” of pure, raw desire, welcome into your life each positive experience. Don’t erect a wall to protect you from experiencing life. The same wall that keeps out your disappointment also keeps out the sunlight of enriching experiences. So let life touch you. The next touch could be the one that turns your life around.

4. Resolve

Resolve says, “I will.” These two words are among the most potent in the English language. I will. Benjamin Disraeli, the great British statesman, once said, “Nothing can resist a human will that will stake even its existence on the extent of its purpose.” In other words, when someone resolves to “do or die,” nothing can stop him.

The mountain climber says, “I will climb the mountain. They’ve told me it’s too high, it’s too far, it’s too steep, it’s too rocky, it’s too difficult. But it’s my mountain. I will climb it. You’ll soon see me waving from the top or you’ll never see me, because unless I reach the peak, I’m not coming back.” Who can argue with such resolve?

When confronted with such iron-willed determination, I can see Time, Fate and Circumstance calling a hasty conference and deciding, “We might as well let him have his dream. He’s said he’s going to get there or die trying.”

The best definition for “resolve” I’ve ever heard came from a schoolgirl in Foster City, California. Many years ago, I was lecturing about success to a group of bright kids at a junior high school. I asked, “Who can tell me what ‘resolve’ means?” Several hands went up, and I did get some pretty good definitions. But the last was the best. A shy girl from the back of the room got up and said with quiet intensity, “I think resolve means promising yourself you will never give up.” That’s it! That’s the best definition I’ve ever heard: Promise yourself you’ll never give up.

Think about it! How long should a baby try to learn how to walk? How long would you give the average baby before you say, “That’s it, you’ve had your chance”? You say that’s crazy? Of course it is. Any mother would say, “My baby is going to keep trying until he learns how to walk!” No wonder everyone walks.

There is a vital lesson in this. Ask yourself, “How long am I going to work to make my dreams come true?” I suggest you answer, “As long as it takes.” That’s what these four emotions are all about.

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